faux cul

i keep thinking i will get the chance to catch up and make nanowrimo a happening thing...
but im coming to terms with the fact that it probably wont happen...

c'est la vie
dire tout et son contraire
parler a tort et a travers
peiger la girafe
poule mouilee

Nanosystemfailure

welp so much for that let's go do nano pep talk i gave myself...

haven't written anything in almost a week ive fallen way behind. i feel like I could possibly still catch up i have some time i just don't have the sanity to do so. i haven't able to relax my mind is too jumbled. i really wonder if there's something wrong with my head. ive always thought faster than i could speak or write which is why i have such attrotious handwriting and why nothing ever comes out of my mouth right but lately i feel like it's gotten worse. even the simplest things to answer leave me stumbling in indecision and confusion. 

i can feel the growing frustration of those around me and that which i hold with myself. it's expanding and boxing me into a corner that im not all that sure I can fight or write my way out of  what's even more frustrating is the complacency that's starting to settle in and cloud my fragile resolve...maybe it's lack of sleep or the cold im pretending not to have or life's little distractions catching up and swallowing my brain bit by bit or perhaps it's just part of getting older. any way it can stop all that junk. ain't nobody got time for that gotta get back on target if i can still find it...